About Us

Victoria Pynchon

I mediate and arbitrate complex commercial disputes, the former with ADR Services, Inc. in Century City and the latter with...

She Mediates

ADR Services, Inc.

She Negotiates

She Negotiates

The 33 cent wage and income gap is unacceptable and unnecessary. So is the cliché glass ceiling. Bottom line, our...

Why "She Negotiates"

There's a new blog on the block called She Negotiates

Why she negotiates?

The “She Negotiates” blog is dedicated to the proposition that “all [people] are created equal . . . [and that to procure the full benefits of citizenship, including economic opportunity] women must themselves become accountable for a substantial portion of the existing income and wage gap that persists with alarming tenacity two full generations (forty years) after the commencement of the Second Wave Women’s Movement.

Although implicit bias continues to dog the retention and promotion of women in society’s most powerful economic, political, and professional fields, as we did forty years ago, we must once again raise to consciousness the way we limit ourselves by failing to accurately assess our own market value, name it, and, through the negotiation of the price of our services and salaries for our employment, claim it with the same sense of entitlement as do our male peers.

Although this is a gender challenge, it is a community issue.  Both men and women suffer when women’s work is not appropriately valued in the marketplace.  Despite the many and considerable advances in the status of women over the past forty years, men continue to suffer disproportionately the primary economic burden of providing the lion’s share of the economic support in American families.  When women know their market value and demand to be recompensed accordingly, this disproportionate burden on men will decline, if not disappear.

Men’s required focus on work stymies their development of networks of supportive intimates, networks that women (naturally) develop and that account for significantly longer and healthier lives.  Men’s required focus on work also contributes to higher rates of heart disease.  As the Harvard Medical School’s Men’s Health Watch recently reported:

Work stress and hostility. It’s a common explanation for excess male mortality, and there may be something to it. Indeed, the stereotype of the harried, hard-driving, overworked male executive has a basis in fact, and work stress can increase the risk of hypertension, heart attack, and stroke. In fact, karoshi, “death from overwork,” is a recognized diagnosis in Japan, and it triggers compensatory payments to survivors. Type A behavior, stress, hostility, and anger have all been implicated as heart disease risk factors, and these traits tend to have a higher prevalence in men than women.

To help women help themselves (and the entire male population) [I've] begun teaching women the negotiation skills to become full workplace – and economic – partners with their male peers.  In every Women’s Negotiation Seminar and Workshop [I have]  taught – online and in person – women report back that they recouped far more than the cost of the program within thirty days by ascertaining their true marketplace value and negotiating it.

My online month-long coached negotiation for women course (“She Negotiates“) begins on June 1 at Craving Balance.  [I] will also be teaching Power Negotiation for Women at the Pasadena City Women’s Club on June 10, 2010.  Please bookmark the date for this later in-person, three-hour seminar – web site for the course will be up soon!

Negotiate a Pay Raise During a Recession? You Bet!

Can't ask for a raise during an economic downturn?  If the recession doesn't stop insurance executives from increasing their own pay and benefits by more than 50% (to $13.1 million) why should it stop you?

Just in case you were manning the Antarctic Ice Station at the time of the revelations prompting this post, here's the L.A. Times Executive Summary.

WellPoint Inc. revealed Friday that it boosted . . . chief executive [Angela Braly's] compensation 51% last year, even as the health insurance giant prepared massive rate increases in California that embroiled it in a national controversy over skyrocketing health insurance costs.

The proposed rate increases of up to 39% in individual policies turned the insurer into a flash point in the healthcare overhaul battle, breathing new life into President Obama's effort at a crucial time in the debate.

Continue Reading

Why Should Women Learn How to Negotiate? A Call to Action

Linda Babcock and Sara Laschever, in the must-read Ask for It!, define negotiation as "a tool to help change [or preserve] the status quo when change [or preservation] requires the agreement of another person.

Why should women learn to negotiate?  Here's the succinct and powerful message Babcock and Laschever have for us:

The consequences of not negotiating in the workplace are pretty extreme.  First and foremost, women earn much less money than men over the course of their careers. We calculated that just by not negotiating her first job offer—simply accepting what she's offered rather than negotiating for more—a woman sacrifices anywhere from half a million dollars to one and a half million dollars in lost income over the course of her career. This is a massive loss for a one-time negotiation—for avoiding what is usually no more than five minutes of discomfort—and it's an unnecessary loss, because most employers expect people to negotiate and therefore offer less than they're prepared to pay. And far more men than women negotiate their first offers. Since men also negotiate more than women throughout their careers—or negotiate more aggressively—the financial losses to women can be truly staggering.

Once upon a time, several generations of women all decided at pretty much the same moment that they did not wish to be economically marginalized anymore.  They didn't want to see themselves portrayed primarily as air-heads who couldn't successfully drive a car to the market, let alone manage a hedge fund.

Continue Reading

Can You Ever REALLY Know Your Adversary's Bottom Line?


It was 8 o'clock on a mid-summer evening and the HMO's representative was packing up his brief case. "I appreciate your hard work," he was saying, "but I simply don't have the authority to compromise any further."

Though we'd only met that morning, I was inclined to believe him because he'd played straight with me throughout the day. Still, no one ever tells you their true bottom line and the number from which Mr. HMO refused to budge seemed odd to me. $124,000. It didn't feel like impasse.

The facts were simple and undisputed. The HMO made bookkeeping errors. As a result, they overpaid Dr. X $200,000 during the previous three years. Dr. X had no good defense to repayment other than an allegedly failing practice and general lack of assets. Business reverses. Divorce. That sort of thing.

During the day, the parties worked well together. They agreed on a protocol for the review of the doctor's financial records as a condition to settlement. We'd also made good progress in reducing the gap between the parties' initially intransigent positions. Dr. X's last offer had been $100,000 -- $25,000 every quarter for the next calendar year secured by a stipulated judgment.

But now both sides were tired and frustrated. They each wanted to make a final "take it or leave it" offer. $124K by the HMO and one hundred by Dr. X. The parties said they could go no further but I was pretty certain Dr. X could be coaxed as high as $115.

In separate caucus, I'd already asked Mr. HMO if he'd take 110.

"I can't even take $123," he replied. "I think it's time to tell Dr. X that it's $124 or we walk."

This is one of the most important moments in a negotiation. A time when the parties, and the mediator, need a good way of judging whether one or more of the parties is bluffing.

"I have to call for more authority," they'll say. And sometimes you'll know and sometimes you won't, whether they're calling the home office or a dead number. Like that scene in Fargo where the car salesman leaves the nervous buyers to ask his "manager" for concessions when he's really just taking a break to talk about the upcoming basketball game.

On the internet, how DO you know whether it's a dog or the CEO on the other end of the line?

Aside from stating the obvious truth -- you never really know -- there are some ways to track down something close to the actual truth. The best way I know is to ask for detail. Story. I think we're hard wired for narrative and that if we are misled by it we're not paying close enough attention. As Mark Twain said, the good thing about the truth is you don't have to remember it.

The HMO's alleged bottom line continued to nag at me. "You can't go to $123?" I asked quizzically. "That seems odd to me. Why is that?"

"Well," said Mr. HMO, pausing as if he thought it might not be a good thing to tell. "To tell you the truth, we overpaid one of our board members, Dr. Y, too." He was sheepish now. Surely someone, maybe many people, had paid for these errors with their careers. "I can't tell you by how much." He looked at his attorney who nodded to him to go on. "I can tell you that Dr. Y re-paid 62% of what we overpaid him. And 124 is 62% of 200. I can't cut anyone else a better deal than that." He paused. "Obviously," he said.

"Obviously," I echoed. "Makes sense." I smiled, "I do hope you've got that bookkeeping thing under control now."

Everyone laughed and I went back to the defendant confident in my assessment that 124 was truly a drop dead number; that Mr. HMO was highly likely to walk unless Dr. X put another $24K on the table.

And that's what the case settled for.

As I drove down Westwood Blvd., late for dinner with friends, I reminded myself that you can tell whether it's the guy with authority or someone's dog Fido on the other end of the phone. Because even in this big anonymous town, we know the truth by its detail. And really, only a writer or a sociopath could make this %$#^ up.

 

 

Transforming Rejections into New Business with "Influence Letters" from ForbesWoman

The following article is a must-read for these economically challenging times. Excerpt below and link to entire article at end of excerpt.  This also works for consultants, attorneys, trainers, mediators, and anyone else who is marketing their services to clients.

by Susan Adams

image
 
The woman was interviewing for a lucrative position as director of a sales team. After having three great meetings full of lively conversation about how she'd handle the job, she was optimistic. But then came the fourth and final interview, with the company's executive vice president. Things were going swimmingly until the interviewee asked a question designed to lock in the offer: "Do you have any issues with my candidacy?"
 
"Frankly, yes," the executive replied. "You're good with people, but you don't have the analytic background we need. Not only would you need to steer the sales team, but you'd need to analyze information and data too." Shocked, the woman left the meeting realizing the offer she'd thought was in the bag was gone.

In a high-pressure job search, is it ever possible to turn a no into a yes?

Absolutely, says Robert Hellmann, a career coach at the Five O'Clock Club, a career counseling firm, who also teaches career development at New York University.  Hellmann was coaching that very woman, and he helped her turn the situation around.

After every job interview, Hellmann advises, you should write not a thank-you note but what he calls an "influence letter." In this case, that letter became his client's key to getting back into the running

The letter should always address the conversation you've had and your skills and experience. First, in the interview, you should ask what challenges the company is facing and what the new hire will need to do as soon as she starts work. In the influence letter, address those challenges concretely, ideally by describing similar challenges you've tackled at a previous job and how you handled them.


Continue reading here.

 

Women in ADR with a Wake Up Sound Track

Anyone who's known me for more than twenty minutes will realize the soundtrack to this Women in ADR video is a very very good sign that I'm regaining my sense of humor without losing my commitment to this issue. Rock on . . .

My article on this subject from which these slides were drawn, appears in the ABA's Law Practice Management Magazine for April, 2010, online here.

Jim Melamed on the Entwined Development of Mediation and Web 2.0

When's the last time you enjoyed listening to an acceptance speech?  Never?  Check this out!  Jim Melamed of Mediate.com accepting an award at the Spring 2010 ABA Dispute Resolution Conference.

Negotiating Women Power Point with a Little Ari Gold Distributive Hard Bargaining

Narrative Mediation and the Subjective Experience of Money

Inga Watkins and I will be presenting this topic at the ABA Dispute Resolution Conference this coming Friday in San Francisco. 

Finesse the Impasse by Changing the Deal: Advice from a Former Disney GC

"Finesse the Impasse by Changing the Deal" -- Negotiation Wisdom from Lou Meisinger

(right, subversive wall crossing by Bansky)

Former Executive Vice-President and General Counsel to The Walt Disney Company, entertainment law heavy-weight Lou Meisinger (now Judge Meisinger thank you very much) gave me the best impasse-breaking advice ever.

"One of the best ways of breaking negotiation impasse in litigation," Lou casually observed, "is to finesse the legal action by transforming the litigation into an opportunity to make a deal."

I'd just finished digesting "negotiation leverage belongs to the party who is perceived to be the one most able to afford the consequences of a failed negotiation," and now Lou was delivering the holy grail of Breaking Impasse. It was like being given a third lung. I could breathe again.

"Transform the litigation into an opportunity to create a business deal." What did that mean?

Three Dimensional Negotiation

On the same day I had this impasse transformation conversation with Lou, I started reading 3-D Negotiation by Harvard Business School Professors David A. Lax< and James K. Sebenius(read the Introduction to the Book Here).

Lou's advice to "finesse the impasse by changing the deal" is discussed in great, articulate and academic detail by Lax and Sebenius. Before going there, it's important to know what they mean by the three dimensions of a deal. Those dimensions, they counsel, are tactics, deal design and set-up.

Tactics

"Tactics" are strategies exercised at the bargaining table, such as improving communication, building trust, countering hardball plays and bridging cross-cultural divides.

Deal Design

At its simplest, deal design involves the invention and structuring of agreements that create greater value for all parties, meet the parties' objectives better than easily conceived alternatives and are more durable that agreements reluctantly accepted by weaker parties. "More durable" means no future litigation over their meaning.

Setup

Set up is the architecture of the deal that ensures the most favorable scope, by involving the right parties, addressing the right issues, and considering all no-deal options. It also involves negotiation sequencing and basic process choices.

Staples Finesses Impasse with the Venture Capitalists

I won't tell Lax and Sebenius' entire Staples office supply store story. You'll have to read the book to get the rest of it. But it's a great example of Lou's advice to finesse impasse by changing the deal.

Staples was the original big-box office supply store. Like all wildly successful early entrepreneurial successes, Staples soon had a formidable competitor, Office Depot. To ward off the competition, Staples needed expansion capital and it needed it fast. All of the venture capital firms and the investment bankers were valuing Staples at pretty much the same price point, a price point its founder considered unacceptable. So he went to the top -- Harvard Business School Professor Bill Sahlman, an expert on venture firms and start-up financing.

Sahlman recommended breaking the impasse by changing the deal-design and the set-up by finding new players and re-sequencing the negotiation. Together, he and Staples founder identified other investors who were flush with money and potentially interested in better ways to deploy it.

Sahlman suggested contracting the limited partners in the venture capital firms who were then holding firm on pricing -- pension funds and insurance companies. Wealthy individuals, he suggested, might also pay more for the opportunity to obtain a piece of Staples' action.

Because the VC firms charged hefty management fees (usually 20% of the profits) by offering the deal directly to a VC's investors, Staples could offer 100% of the profits for the same share of their investment in the Staple's pie, increasing the actual value of each share by 20%.

As Lax and Sebenius stress, this result could not have been achieved by negotiations "at the table" or even with the originally identified stake-holders. What Staples did was to "favorably reset the table with right new parties whose interests were far more aligned with the deal he wanted to do." Then it sequenced the process by going back to the VC's and the investment banks, saying, "this thing is filling up fast; do you guys want to play or not?"

Conclusion

How, you ask, can this paradigm be applied to litigation where the players are already fixed and can't simply walk away if they do not reach a deal? By transforming the litigation into a business opportunity as Lou suggests.

If the parties to commercial litigation realize their lawsuit can serve as one of many bargaining chips that either party can deploy to create a business opportunity for both, what originally looked like a brick wall of impasse is transformed into dozens, even hundreds of doors to a more profitable and productive future. That's the way you get yourself and your clients out of the litigation lock-box. Just walk out the door.

Negotiation as Poker Game for Your Next Law Firm Retreat

Learn how to play Texas Hold 'Em (or win more often) while maximizing your negotiation strategies and tactics at your next firm retreat with the Pynchon Negotiation Seminar's "Negotiation as Poker Game."  For testimonials and pricing, go to the Settle It Now! website and click on "Negotiation Training."  

Negotiation as Poker Game
The training for which this particular power point presentation was prepared was tailored for an organization of women healthcare executives.  Here's what they had to say about it:
The women at the X2 Healthcare Network were so enthused by the concepts Victoria presented in her keynote, "Winning" the Negotiation, that we are planning on her full-day workshop as the focal point to our next annual retreat. Victoria's style was engaging and participatory, and we all went away wanting more of her strategies, tactics and entertainment.  Gale Wilson-Steele of Health Media Syndicate ~ a MEDSEEK Partner
For negotiation tips and strategies in bite-sized pieces, fan my new Facebook page for Pynchon Negotiation Seminars here!

 

 

Social Media for Lawyers, Mediators, Negotiators and Friends

I make these presentations because people ask me all the time how to use and maximize the value of social networking to build their businesses.  This presentation includes a YouTube video on building a network with Facebook Fan PagesSocial Networking 101

Geoff Sharp Returns with the Best Negotiation/Mediation Advice in the ADR-O-Sphere

Remember mediator blah blah . . . . ?  New Zealand mediator and mediation/negotiation trainer Geoff Sharp's justly revered blog?  It still exists, along with an incredible treasure trove of helpful suggestions, insights, links, case studies, white papers, forms, shout-out's, call downs, criticisms and praise.  mediator blah blah has been shuttered and silent since Geoff "bowed out" in August of 2009, followed by the funereal wailings, rending of garments and heaping of ashes by those whose professional and personal lives were enriched every time Geoff put hand to keyboard.

Somewhere mediators and negotiators must have been saying "I do believe, I do believe, I do believe," or tapping their ruby shoes together.  Today, Tinker Bell recovers and Dorothy returns to Kansas. 

Geoff Sharp is baaacccckkkkkkkkkkkk and he's looking awfully good and modern walking toward you on his new web home with forms to deliver, process and case studies to share, articles to hand over, and YES INDEED, a new blog whose title m3 makes Geoff appear to be the only mediator in the English-speaking world who might actually recall how to solve a quadratic equation.

Welcome back Geoff!  We sorely and sincerely missed you!

p.s. kill that blog registration thing-a-ma-jiggy please.