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Victoria Pynchon

As the co-founder of She Negotiates Consulting and Training, I offer my services as a keynote speaker, trainer and consultant....

She Mediates

ADR Services, Inc.

She Negotiates

She Negotiates

The 33 cent wage and income gap is unacceptable and unnecessary. So is the cliché glass ceiling. Bottom line, our...

The Ten Commandments of Negotiation

The Ten Commandments movie poster, from WikipediaThou Shalt Do Thine Own Research, ascertaining thine own market value and learning what thine bargaining partner wishes to accomplish, to whom she must answer, what interests she must satisfy and what she most fears and desires.

Thou Shalt Make the First Proposal, framing thine own goods or services in the most favorable light and anchoring high enough to give thee sufficient room to make at least three bargained-for concessions.

Thou Shalt Ask Thine Bargaining Partner Open-Ended Questions to learn that which thine own research cannot ascertain, assuring thine bargaining partner that two canst make a better deal for both than either canst serve thine own needs alone.

 Thou Shalt Name Thine Own Concessions and Beseech Thine Bargaining Partner to Reciprocate with the same degree of difficulty with which thine own concessions were made.

Thou Shalt Make No Assumptions, actively listening to thine bargaining partner by beseeching her to share her desires, needs, fears, preferences, priorities, constraints and hidden stakeholders for the purpose of better understanding what thou might deliver to her and she might trade with thee to increase both thine fortunes.

Thou Shalt Log Roll, offering to trade items of low cost to thee but high value to thine bargaining partner and seeking items of high value to thee but low cost to thine bargaining partner.

Thou Shalt Not Split the Baby, as the story of the wise King Solomon teaches us. Offering to split the baby demonstrates indifference to the welfare of the value being bargained for, besmirching thine honor. It has oft been said – indeed it has been written – that any yutz with ears can divide by two.

Continue reading at ForbesWoman

If you buy Dummies, either in the Kindle or the paperback edition, you’ll have a great index for finding solutions to your most difficult negotiation and dispute resolution challenges. You can also pick up negotiation tips by following the Dummies twitter feed @mediatesuccess or “liking” the book’s Facebook page here.

Thanks to This American Life for giving me the idea of doing a “ten commandments” post this week.


Comments (3)

Read through and enter the discussion by using the form at the end
Don Philbin - April 16, 2012 8:55 AM

Brilliant, as usual.

Victoria Pynchon - April 16, 2012 10:09 AM

Thanks Don! Wish I were going to the ABA - love to hear you speak!

by dre earbuds sale - August 10, 2012 6:26 PM

Thank you for sharing, this information is useful to me. good quality bairenhimaha

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